Posts Tagged Asperger’s

Speak Softly and Carry a Big Cane

house bathtub

Of all the characters on TV, I relate most to the irascible doctor who can’t stand people.  And who bears a strong resemblance to Sherlock Holmes and a star of Blackadder.

The egotistical, (mostly) unrepentant bastard might seem an unlikely subject for this blog.

But Dr. Gregory House represents a challenge journalists face frequently: the challenge of balancing rationalism and humanity. He also embodies the struggle to change while staying true to yourself.

I told you this blog would get geeky.

Drawing Lines in the Sand

One of my favorite House episodes focuses on his treatment of a severely autistic boy.

Unlike his fellow doctors, House is able to communicate with the child.  He convinces him to inhale anesthesia and uses the boy’s beloved PSP to send him a message.

At the same time, House makes a nuisance of himself to protest the removal of his blood-stained office carpet.

His teammates speculate he has Asperger’s Syndrome and can’t tolerate change, a symptom of the disorder. They think it explains his emotional disconnection and quirks.

Spoiler Alert:  Nope. He’s just a jerk.

Turns out he was pretending to have Asperger’s to con his boss into returning his carpet.

But that’s not the most important revelation.

The most fascinating reveal is that House may not have autism, but he wishes he does. House, who values rationality above all else, opines about the boy:

Why would you feel sorry for someone that gets to opt out of the inane courteous formalities which are utterly meaningless, insincere and therefore degrading?

This kid doesn’t have to pretend to be interested in your back pain, your secretions or your grandma’s itchy place. …I don’t pity this kid – I envy him.

You Can’t Always Get What You Want

House’s desire for an excuse to defy social norms (or simply be a jerk) is intriguing.

When I was younger, I used my Asperger’s Syndrome as an excuse not to make eye contact or brush my hair. I still use it as an excuse to speak whatever’s on my mind and invade peoples’ privacy.

Journalists also value the opportunity to escape awkward social graces, and, like House, we use our jobs as an excuse to do so.

We criticize public officials and call them out on their lies. We break rules of propriety to get information. We make private lives public and expose secrets for all to see.

We justify ourselves using rationalism, much as House uses rationalism to justify intruding into patients’ lives, medically and socially.

If we don’t question authorities, few others will. It takes assertiveness, honesty and at least a little outrage to do our jobs. All this is true.

People accept us because we make life better, just as House’s boss doesn’t fire him because he’s an asset to the hospital.

But this only lasts until our sense of privilege and rationality outweighs our dedication to those we serve.

Both Sides Now

Journalists and House are both grappling with identity crises right now, and the cases fascinate me as I attempt to reconcile my autism with my desire to better myself.

House is realizing that his rationalism is changing from a commodity to a liability. There’s a difference between being a jerk who callsAutopsy-house-md-3129242-100-100 out patients on hypocrisy and being a bully who questions the motives of a dying girl.

Journalists are also grappling with change. We’re adapting to a world where blogs and online publications offer a convenient alternative to traditional media.

As we do so, however, we sometimes allow rationalism to overcome our humanity.

Earlier this year, the St. Petersburg Times posted a mug shot website that updates with arrest information and gives general stats about the crimes and accused.

Rationally, there’s nothing wrong with the project. The information is public record, and people deserve to know.

But it lacks the humanity that characterizes the best of journalism. It reduces people to images and statistics. It robs them of motive, background and character.

Compare that to the Times’ recent coverage of a chief Scientologist’s alleged mistreatment of his staff and worshippers.

It’s hard-edged and incorporates online-exclusive elements. Most importantly, it doesn’t use rationality to shy away from humanity. It uses video interviews and anecdotes to show personality and motive.

It makes people care.

The  ability to blend humanity and rationality to tell a compelling story is what distinguishes  journalists from other news sources.

And it allows us to change and adapt while remaining relevant and true to our nature.

…But If You Try Sometimes You Just Might Find

As I watch journalists and House pursue change, I  learn from their choices.

When my autistic tendencies start to become an annoyance, I remember how House tempers his jerk tendencies with his humanity.  I take a deep breath and think about how I can curb or counter my behavior.

When rationalism puts me in danger of emphasizing facts and figures over characters in my stories, I remember how other journalists work humanity into their articles. I follow their example to stay humane and fair in my own work.

Learning how my real and fictional role models confront change helps me realize how I can improve myself. It gives me confidence that I can change myself without betraying what makes me special.

It gives me hope for the future of journalism. And it gives me faith in House’s ability to change and pursue a relationship with his boss.

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Greetings from the Empire of the Ants

I love journalism. I also love to eat. And travel. And buy books.

And enjoy many other pleasures that require earning a stable income.

In the face of frequent news of newspaper shutdowns or closures, however, it’s hard not to worry.

I worry I won’t be able reconcile my love for journalism with my hope for a stable career that will allow me to live independently, help others and have fun.

Sometimes, I get angry that I devoted time and energy to an industry in its apparent death throes.

But then, I remember how much my life has changed since I started to pursue a career as a reporter.

Journalism took me from the largest island of the Bahamas to the hills of New England and the Treasure Coast of Florida, also known as the  Empire of the Ants.

I went crabbing with a musician struggling to support his family on the north coast of Andros Island and interviewed residents of a beachside hamlet hoping to see their town revitalized.

I met camels raised in the hills of New Hampshire and dined on pizza with a Sudanese refugee.

Journalism forced me to seek conversation and intimacy, a frightening task for someone with Asperger’s Syndrome, a high-functioning form of autism.

It forced me to fight my skittish inner nature and confront police, town officials and, most intimidating, angry parents.

It introduced me to some of my best friends and mentors.

And despite journalism’s troubling decline and a long and tiresome job search, I still love and am loyal to the profession that helped me mature as a writer and human.

Just not to the exclusion of another career that could make me happy.

So this blog is a chronicle of my journey to find my place in the changing world of journalism, or, failing that, find my place in another fulfilling career.

And it’s an exploration of how my Asperger’s Syndrome changes how I look at the world as a reporter and human being.

But most of all, this blog is going to be fun. The most amusing facet of having the Geek Syndrome is that it makes me obsess about anything that interests me.

That includes books, TV shows, comics, cartoons or music.  I use these to learn about and interact with the world, along with my daily interactions with sources, friends and family.

But more on that in another blog post.

I hope you find this blog entertaining and helpful. I know it helps me vent, as  did my last blog. More importantly, however, I want this to become a resource for other journalists, autistics or geeks. Feel free to comment, ask  questions or propose a way to contribute. I’m excited to see how this blog evolves, and I hope it allows me to keep in contact with old friends and meet new ones.

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